To be ignored

Expressing my feelings is normal to me. It is also necessary. Innate. As important as oxygen.
Through my expressing my darkest and joyfullests, I have no aims to shock, or upset anyone. To me, to express means to exist; to exist means to be read, acknoledged by others, or heard by others.
To be ignored means I don't exist, I might as well be dead.
Indifference and silence(from others) are my worst nightmare.
It does aggravate me very much,particularly when I care.
Does it, you?.

Though, the pattern repeats once again. It happened the last 2 times also.
They vanish from the surface of the earth.
Leaving me to my anger, frustrated and unresolved state of mind that is eating the whole of me day and night, leaving me as an obsessive, obsessed, destructive state where nothing matters, except their silence.

I know there is something wrong with me.

Though, there must be something wrong with them also.

I just hope that He, is not dead.

Ce serait le comble du silence.
Peut-etre est-il mort.
Peut-etre il ne reviendra plus jamais.

Tant pis.

Je dois faire ma vie, seule, comme je l'ai faite jusqu'a present.
Pourquoi aurais-je besoin de quelqu'un de proche, alors que je peux trouver mon bonheur avec mes amis.?,,